I am six weeks away from having my hip replacement and I have been struggling with feelings of guilt over having the opportunity to get my hip fixed. I realize it is illogical to feel guilty but here is the way my brain is working.
I was just diagnosed last year with PVNS and have only had one surgery to clean out the joint and correct the problems. Because the PVNS is so destructive I know I will definitely need the replacement but I hear so many stories of the struggles others have gone through and I feel like I haven't "paid my dues" does that make any sense?
I should re-frame the self talk and accept that I have a surgeon who recognizes that it will be financially beneficial to the Insurance company and me to NOT have repeat arthroscopys for this damaging disease. In the long run having the replacement which should run about 60K will be less expensive than enduring 3 or 4 more arthroscopys at 46K each.
Not to mention the wear and tear on my body going through multiple trips under anesthesia and the 6 to 8 weeks of recovery for each scope. Time off work and extra weight that I am sure I will gain by not being able to move properly. Shoot I gained 15 lbs after my broken ankle in July.
So I KNOW I need it but I am concerned that Insurance at the last minute will say NO and will insist that they do another scope. I am already on the Surgeons schedule for 12/4/12 and when I chatted with his secretary I learned that they don't work on the pre-certification until the month before so there is a bit more time for them to reject me. And if that happens I will have to wait several more weeks to be added to his schedule for his scope day since he has specific days set aside for scopes and others for replacements.
Here is the reality of how my hip is working now. Some parts of the day I can walk with out a limp but as the day progresses I am swaying like a Weeble (remember the Weebles that wobble but don't fall down?).
Sitting in the van all day exacerbates the pain and limping and I end up coming home and getting right into my pj's and going to bed with either my frozen popcorn pack or my heating pad. I have tried several soaks in the tub with Epsom salts and did not see any improvement. I am taking Tylenol #3 for pain management and feel as though I am eating them like candy when in reality I am taking 1 every 6 hours and I am allowed to have 1-2 every 4 hours, so I am not using as many as I could. I also am taking 15 mg of Mobic once a day which I am still not sure if it is helping or not, however I am not willing to forgo it just to make sure!
Sleep continues to elude me I lay down and try to sleep and can't get comfortable. I can't lay on my left side because of my hip and I can't lay on my right side because of my shoulder (torn rotator cuff and bone spur) which I need to get fixed as well. This leaves me with 2 options on my back propped up and surrounded by pillows, or in a modified stomach position. Neither of them are comfortable for long periods of time and I generally get 2 hours of sleep before waking up and changing positions, walking around, taking med's, watching TV. etc for the next 2-3 hours before I can go back to sleep.
On the up side my ankle improves every day and my Orthopedic Foot and Ankle Surgeon Dr. Lee has cleared me and I am allowed to return to normal activities. So I started going back to the pool and walking in the water. My ankle is still not strong enough for actual lap swimming so I am building it back up by practicing kicking at the steps and doing one or two lengths with a kick board. I made it to the pool on M and W the first 2 weeks and this week I did M,W,F. I also started to walk the dogs again but have kept it to 1-2 laps around the block. My older dog who is also having hip problems can't do more than one lap and if I try to go further with him I end up having to pick him up (all 49lbs) of him and carry him home. NOT fun.
So my goal for the next 6 weeks is to continue to rebuild the ankle strength by swimming and walking and hopefully drop a few of those 15 extra pounds that I gained after breaking my ankle. All in hopes that when I do have my surgery I can haul myself around on my crutches.
Speaking of crutches I just ordered my new pair of crutches I can't wait to see if they are as AWESOME as they look!
http://www.mobilegs.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.products_mobiultra
These are so cool they are ergonomically correct and the shoulder saddle is mobile so it moves with your shoulder rather than rubbing against it. We shall see!
I was just diagnosed last year with PVNS and have only had one surgery to clean out the joint and correct the problems. Because the PVNS is so destructive I know I will definitely need the replacement but I hear so many stories of the struggles others have gone through and I feel like I haven't "paid my dues" does that make any sense?
I should re-frame the self talk and accept that I have a surgeon who recognizes that it will be financially beneficial to the Insurance company and me to NOT have repeat arthroscopys for this damaging disease. In the long run having the replacement which should run about 60K will be less expensive than enduring 3 or 4 more arthroscopys at 46K each.
Not to mention the wear and tear on my body going through multiple trips under anesthesia and the 6 to 8 weeks of recovery for each scope. Time off work and extra weight that I am sure I will gain by not being able to move properly. Shoot I gained 15 lbs after my broken ankle in July.
So I KNOW I need it but I am concerned that Insurance at the last minute will say NO and will insist that they do another scope. I am already on the Surgeons schedule for 12/4/12 and when I chatted with his secretary I learned that they don't work on the pre-certification until the month before so there is a bit more time for them to reject me. And if that happens I will have to wait several more weeks to be added to his schedule for his scope day since he has specific days set aside for scopes and others for replacements.
Here is the reality of how my hip is working now. Some parts of the day I can walk with out a limp but as the day progresses I am swaying like a Weeble (remember the Weebles that wobble but don't fall down?).
Sitting in the van all day exacerbates the pain and limping and I end up coming home and getting right into my pj's and going to bed with either my frozen popcorn pack or my heating pad. I have tried several soaks in the tub with Epsom salts and did not see any improvement. I am taking Tylenol #3 for pain management and feel as though I am eating them like candy when in reality I am taking 1 every 6 hours and I am allowed to have 1-2 every 4 hours, so I am not using as many as I could. I also am taking 15 mg of Mobic once a day which I am still not sure if it is helping or not, however I am not willing to forgo it just to make sure!
Sleep continues to elude me I lay down and try to sleep and can't get comfortable. I can't lay on my left side because of my hip and I can't lay on my right side because of my shoulder (torn rotator cuff and bone spur) which I need to get fixed as well. This leaves me with 2 options on my back propped up and surrounded by pillows, or in a modified stomach position. Neither of them are comfortable for long periods of time and I generally get 2 hours of sleep before waking up and changing positions, walking around, taking med's, watching TV. etc for the next 2-3 hours before I can go back to sleep.
On the up side my ankle improves every day and my Orthopedic Foot and Ankle Surgeon Dr. Lee has cleared me and I am allowed to return to normal activities. So I started going back to the pool and walking in the water. My ankle is still not strong enough for actual lap swimming so I am building it back up by practicing kicking at the steps and doing one or two lengths with a kick board. I made it to the pool on M and W the first 2 weeks and this week I did M,W,F. I also started to walk the dogs again but have kept it to 1-2 laps around the block. My older dog who is also having hip problems can't do more than one lap and if I try to go further with him I end up having to pick him up (all 49lbs) of him and carry him home. NOT fun.
So my goal for the next 6 weeks is to continue to rebuild the ankle strength by swimming and walking and hopefully drop a few of those 15 extra pounds that I gained after breaking my ankle. All in hopes that when I do have my surgery I can haul myself around on my crutches.
Speaking of crutches I just ordered my new pair of crutches I can't wait to see if they are as AWESOME as they look!
http://www.mobilegs.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=home.products_mobiultra
These are so cool they are ergonomically correct and the shoulder saddle is mobile so it moves with your shoulder rather than rubbing against it. We shall see!
Sheila Rae it is your life and not the insurance company's. After enduring the pain, you are aware what part of life you may be missing out on. Believe it or not, writing requires a fair bit of sitting, and a sore, painful hip will not allow this. I am a teacher, but after drove truck for 3 years. This of course required a lot of sitting, for long periods of time. Go to any truck stop in North America and see how many truck drivers get out of their truck and race to go inside. Good luck.
ReplyDeleteThanks Doug! Actually I drive all over OH WV and KY for work and the truck stops and rest areas are my frequent stops and you are right they dash away from the vehicle. I make it a habit to stop every 30- 45 minutes and get up and out of the van and walk, even a brief walk to the rest room helps.
ReplyDeleteHow do you like teaching?